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I am inordinately fond of monkeys. I like to watch them, I like to tease them, I like any commercial that has a monkey and I will buy any product advertised by a monkey, especially if it involves a smoking monkey.

Monkeys are little people in monkey suits.

Stealing a monkey is NOT cool. And somebody stole Banana Sam from the San Francisco zoo. If I found that person I would beat them with a monkey stick. I don't know what a monkey stick is, but it sounds like appropriate punishment.

Thieves Steal Monkey From SF Zoo

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Banana-Sam is a squirrel monkey like the ones in this picture.

By Mike Anderson

"...Someone broke into an exhibit and stole a monkey from the San Francisco Zoo, the zoo discovered Friday morning.

The one-foot-tall squirrel monkey's name is "Banana-Sam." He is 17 years old and weighs about two pounds.

The vandals apparently cut through a zoo gate overnight. Then they got onto the roof of the primate exhibits. The zoo found two holes cut through the mesh net where Banana-Sam was stolen.

Although he appears cute and cuddly, Banana-Sam has very sharp teeth and will not hesitate to bite if provoked, according to Zoo staff. His bites can easily cause infections. The monkey also eats very particular food. 

“This was a criminal act of vandalism and trespassing and we are working with the police to identify the perpetrators,” said Tanya Peterson, President and Executive Director of the San Francisco Zoological Society.